Five Common Adoption Questions
Adoption has been a dream, but it wasn’t until nearly three years ago it became a reality. August 30, 2011 was one of the best days of my life! Kevin and I had prayed for months for this moment. At around 11:00 AM I heard the screams of a newly delivered baby. I held my sweet baby boy, Noah, for the first time. Obviously adoption has radically changed my life. I am tempted to talk on and on about every detail that made Noah our little miracle, but for sake of time I won’t. Because we are traveling on deputation and in the process of our second adoption we are asked many questions. We like to think of ourselves as adoption advocates as we promote orphan care. We are always happy when people ask questions and show interest in adoption. Here are FIVE questions we get asked frequently.
1. Isn’t it expensive?
I think this is a common questions because being a missionary is obviously not the career with the big bucks. People wonder, “How can YOU possibly afford adoption?” This question is one of my favorites to be honest. I get a great opportunity to share about God’s goodness and provision in our lives. When it came time to start our paper work for our second adoption we barely had enough money to cover the home study. We just stepped out in faith and prayed. I spent a lot of time applying for grants and filling out MORE paperwork. Slowly God provided for nearly 75% of our entire adoption funds needed! Here are some of the generous grant organizations who helped us.
- Show Hope
- Life Song for Orphans
- Katelyn’s Fund
- Families Outreach
- Oath Ministry
- Family, friends, and our local church
2. Is he your real son?
YES! I understand that most people mean to say, “Is he your biological son?” I know that with my head, but when somebody says, “Is he real?” it can be hurtful. Noah is our REAL son, and he is very much a REAL God-given miracle through adoption. Noah is as much ours as any biological child would ever be. Yes, he is our REAL son and we are his REAL parents. 🙂
3. Does Noah know he’s adopted?
This one perplexes me. If he didn’t know he was adopted do you think we would openly talk about it, especially in front of him? Of course Noah knows he is adopted! We talk about it at home. We read books about adoption at bedtime. It’s part of our vocabulary and we are very comfortable speaking honestly in an age-appropriate manner with him. Noah has an incredible story and one that he should be proud to share, if he chooses!
4. Have you requested a specific race or gender?
No, we are simply open to the child of God’s choosing for our family. God’s love sees no color or nationality. He is a just God who died for male, female, black, white, yellow, healthy, feeble, rich, or poor. God’s family is full of people from all nations. If we are to mirror God’s love then we ought to look beyond the mere color of skin and see a child in need of a home, and ultimately a Savior!
5. When will you have a placement?
I have no idea. The wait has been long – 504 days. I struggle on a daily basis as I seek to find my true rest and peace from Him. It has been harder this time not to have anything tangible as a link to my baby. It seems so abstract…she/he is out there – somewhere. Where? Many nights I just want to whisper, “I love you. You are so special to me.” I am decorating the nursery with Guess How Much I Love You theme. If you have read that children’s book you will remember the line, “I love you to the moon and back!” I have this strange connection with the moon ever since we have prepared the room. When I look up in the dark sky and see a bright, full moon it warms my heart as I think of my baby. While I watch the moon I’m reminded of my Creator and that He holds the universe in His hand. If He can do that, I know He will bring my baby to me.
Thanks for loving our family through this journey. Please pray God would bring our little one to us soon.